Friday, December 21, 2007

My Festivus Eve

So since everyone is out of town and I STILL don't have any money or cards after losing my wallet last week, I have spent my night doing the following:

- Taking the Blue Line to Western and walking to the Tap Room for a few $2 pints

- Coming home and watching Hannibal Rising (review forthcoming) while continuing to drink beer

- Blogging my arse off

- Now, after Reuter fixed my VCR last weekend, I am watching my tape of Die Hard 2: Die Harder to see Fred Thompson at his acting peak (and I am still drinking beer)

Sure, it's the worst of the four Die Hard movies, but that's like being the ugliest Victoria's Secret model: it still is awesome compared to most other movies (or women, respectively). Plus, one of the bad guys is the dude who played Swede Risberg in Eight Men Out:



Now comes the half-drunk live-blogging:

Let's not forget Chicago's own Dennis Franz in the movie as the hard-ass DC cop. The most amazing thing is that when he filmed this movie, he was closer to my current age than my dad's, while he right now OLDER than my dad (who was born in 1946). Cripes, I'm getting old.

How about another note: faxes are considered high-tech in this movie. Wow. Break out the Apple II's!

Oh crap, the first Fred! sighting! Awesome. Hail to the chief. Very underrated Christmas movie, I say.

Oh my goodness...John McClane and the next president in the same control tower. I almost had a heart attack, though it could have been the lack of exercise. AWESOME. Yes, I'm a nerd for both Die Hard movies and Fred! Also, the Budweisers are flowing pretty quickly.

This is no newsflash, but the biggest problem with this movie is that it's the ultimate in late 1980's-early 1990's sequels. By that I mean that there are a bunch of snarky and half-clever references to the first movie. This was amazingly rectified in the incredibly awesome third movie only 5 years later; it was basically a turning point for Hollywood to dump the lame sequel model for the MUCH more successful model they've had since then for any good ones. The best example is probably Spiderman 2, which standing alone was an Oscar-worthy movie (says I), let alone for those that saw the first one (which is, of course, everyone).

Sweet. I can't believe after watching Con Air so often I finally see the guy who was Vince Larkin's nemesis. You know, the guy with the really fast car that Larkin steals to get to the abondoned Air Force base. Anyway, I've got a great eye for those links between my favorite movies I have on tape. I'm most amazed that Con Air came out in 1997, which is after I graduated school. I would have guessed it was earlier. Anyway, I've always loved it while Tony has HATED it.

How about one of the all-time best bad guys in movie history in William Atherton, who plays the smarmy TV reporter? He was also in the same role in Ghostbusters, Real Genius, and the first Die Hard.

Holy balls, John Amos! Dynomite!

It's really been a long time since I've watched a movie on tape. With good reason,I guess, since the quality is garbage.

OK, now the bad guys get away from the church on snowmobiles. DC never gets very much snow. How could they ever plan such an escape? They aren't the best meterologists in the area, I'm sure. Paint me skeptical.

Before John Amos' character turns on McClane, he's one of the best in the movie. He pretty much makes the movie since the rest of it is so ridiculous. John Amos rules!

Now Lorenzo is with McClane. About F'n time. Kick some butt, dudes.

Fred's been gone for the past hour and more. But now he's back! Cut some taxes and deport some illegals, Fred!

Kick ass. I just heard this:

[McClane is showing his nervousness while riding in a helicopter]
Chopper Pilot: What's the matter, cowboy? Ride too rough?
John McClane: I don't like to fly.
Samantha Coleman: Then what are you doing here?
John McClane: I don't like to lose either.

Yeah!

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